Chivalry, dating all the way back to the 12th century, was primarily utilized by medieval knights to guide their conduct and act as a code of honor. Chivalry’s meaning stayed true throughout the later ages and influenced the system of values shared by elite societies.
Today, it appears the word doesn’t mean something all that different in annotation, as it can be classified as a set of behaviors that are courteous, brave and respectful.
However, one could argue that chivalry means something entirely different for today’s generation and might not be as apparent anymore within society.
I am here to tell you that chivalry is alive and well, subjectively.
Valentine’s Day just passed, and while it was forgotten for a moment when I woke up that morning, it seemed that I was quickly reminded by the large majority of our community who did not. Walking in to get my usual dose of what is probably too much caffeine at the UT’s local Walgreens, I was dumbfounded at not just the one, but three lines at each register snaking around the store.
Why is it significant that Walgreens was extremely busy on Valentine’s Day?
On this particular day, these shoppers all had something in common — they all had some sort of gift for their valentine in hand. Flowers, cards, stuffed bears and balloons were flying off the shelves — an act so little, but meaning so much to whomever would later receive them.
Buying your significant other a present on the day of love or just spending one-on-one time together seems like the bare minimum, but in today’s age, it might have felt like a rarity for some. Many relationships in 2025 have been built with 21st century incentives, like social media or dating apps. This is not to harp on you if you found your soulmate via Tinder, no. It is to emphasize that maybe the easiness of finding your partner on an app or site might set the trajectory of how serious the effort in the relationship is displayed in the future.
While it’s obvious we aren’t medieval people practicing what they knew to be chivalry, we also aren’t in a device-free, 2000s rom com meeting our so-called soulmates in the pouring rain with dramatic music playing. Effort in today’s age, where things can seem as easy and accessible as a swipe or a like, is so incredibly important and much more than that. Nevertheless, going to Walgreens for your boyfriend or girlfriend is surely a start.
I think it is significant to note that it was not just the college-aged kids buying goodies for their loved ones. I saw a handful of variously aged adults and elderly being a part of this crowd participating in the day of love, and this was something that I couldn’t help but smile really big at.
I am not a marriage or relationship coach by any means, but I know enough about people’s behavior patterns to know that as they age, it gets harder to find the time or the energy to put into your partner or relationship. Work, money and even kids can so easily get in the way of a relationship and make a couple oblivious to why they are even together to start with.
There is a common idea that relationships should consist of two halves — 50% from each individual to match that uniting 100%.
This is not always realistic.
Sometimes you can’t always give your best self to your partner with personal or life factors in the way, at any age for that matter. Sometimes you can only give a certain amount, but showing up and supporting your partner no matter what percent you are at is key.
I was once told by a very wise woman,“You have to date each other again and again,” when I asked how she still remains content and happy in her many years of marriage.
When pondering my generation’s chivalrous efforts, I am certain that if you care enough to date someone or hook up with them, you most certainly can care enough to acknowledge their meaning to you on Valentine’s Day.
Getting them something small (or not even spending money and reading our nine college date night ideas for a budget-friendly act of love column) goes such a long way. (Brownie points to my boyfriend who simply got me takeout, flowers and cupcakes — a girl’s dream).
With Valentine’s just passing by, this holiday could have also acted as a wake-up call or a chivalry test, if you will, for some.
Did your partner forget about Valentine’s Day? Did they not post you and show you off? Did they even wish you well for the day? If you answered yes to any of these questions, then you might need to re-evaluate your commitment decisions.
This is also not only important to remember on Valentine’s Day, but in general.
Are they practicing the values of chivalry just like the great knights did so long ago? Does your partner compliment you, surprise you or just spend valuable time with you? If you can’t make sense of these questions, then once again, it might be time to do some serious thinking.
While chivalry appears not to be dead this Valentine’s Day, let’s not let it die out after just one special day. Keep showing up for your partner, keep flirting, keep opening the door or taking them on a date and see how far it’ll take you.
Ansley Graves is a junior at UT this year studying journalism. She can be reached at [email protected].
Columns and letters of The Daily Beacon are the views of the individual and do not necessarily reflect the views of the Beacon or the Beacon’s editorial staff.
