It is no secret that entering your 20s can be that awkward transition period. Let me rephrase that: It is that awkward transition period. You are trying to figure out a “big person” career, a social life and maybe even a love life. You might ask yourself, “What the heck am I going to do with my life?” or “Am I ever going to find someone?”
And that’s OK. Nobody really knows what they are doing or where they are going, and we need to give ourselves more credit for where we are currently and how far we have come.
At this age, you might find yourself missing your high school sweetheart that was totally going to last. Besides, it was just college that got in the way of the relationship, right? You might not have scoped out the dating scene since high school and feel kind of stuck. You might even find yourself scoffing at the happy couples that did make it from high school and ended up staying together for college, which I definitely do not do.
If any of these scenarios sound like you, do not fear. More people are experiencing this than you would have thought, and it is OK to be frustrated or lost.
If you are like me, you are not actively looking for a relationship, but the thought of one might be nice. I am certainly no expert in the dating field, but I have learned some valuable knowledge along the way that might be valuable to you, too. With that being said, there are some serious factors to consider when taking on the role of girlfriend, boyfriend or partner in this awkward transition period that we all are just trying to get through.
In the wise words of my roommate and best friend, Ryleigh Dougall, all people should stick to two rules when it comes to looking for that special someone.
Rule No. 1: If you have to ask yourself if they are interested in you, they are probably not.
Rule No. 2: If they wanted to, they would.
While these rules might seem cliche or even implied, they actually have significantly changed my view on the dating scene when I applied them to a person of interest. When you apply these words of wisdom to someone you are involved with, you will automatically see a filter of who is worthy of being in your life and who is not. You can and should also apply this rule to platonic relationships.
Sometimes, it can be hard to apply this filter when you really want your involvement with this person to work. We all hear excuses like, “But he is the social chair of his frat” or “But they liked my Instagram story!”
No buts! If they are not showing you that you have their full interest at heart, no matter who they are, it is time to cut it off.
We are not 16 years old anymore. This age is the prime of our lives when we form the most valuable and long-lasting relationships. Personally, as a 20-year-old, I do not have time for games. I work long hours, dedicate time to academics and am involved in a sorority. In short, I do not have time for you to like my Instagram story and not look in my direction when I see you on campus.
Lastly, try something new. Apply these rules to your romantic life and see how it goes. You might happen to find that special someone you are so worthy of having.
Ansley Graves is a sophomore at UT this year studying business. She can be reached at [email protected].
Columns and letters of The Daily Beacon are the views of the individual and do not necessarily reflect the views of the Beacon or the Beacon’s editorial staff.
